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A FREE RESOURCE FROM CHANGEFULLY

The Parent Moment

For the moments when your athlete needs you more than your advice.

Five conversations that help young athletes navigate pressure, expectations and confidence.

Being the parent of a young athlete isn't always easy. Especially when someone you love is struggling with pressure, confidence or expectations. We've created a free, practical guide to help you have five meaningful conversations.

Read the free parent guide Ask about mental performance coaching

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FIVE CONVERSATIONS / SOMETHING TO COME BACK TO

Five Conversations That Help Young Athletes With Pressure

You don't need to have every answer. Sometimes curiosity, listening and reassurance can be more valuable than advice.

AFTER A DISAPPOINTING PERFORMANCE

Ask“Would you like to talk about it, or would you prefer some space?”

Why Give your athlete the choice to reflect when they're ready.

Want more information?

Let them set the pace.

You can offer a conversation without needing to begin it immediately. If they choose space, leave the invitation open.

Choose one prompt that fits the moment:

  • “Would you like me to listen, ask a few questions, or help you think about what comes next?”
  • “What felt hardest about that experience for you?”
  • “Is there anything you would like me to understand that I might have missed?”

Try not to turn the trip home into a performance review. A simple “I’m here when you’re ready” can leave room for them to choose.

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WHEN EXPECTATIONS FEEL OVERWHELMING

Ask“What are you expecting of yourself, and which parts can you actually influence?”

Why Help shift attention from outcomes towards actions.

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Make the expectation more specific.

Listen to what they think they have to achieve before suggesting a different perspective. Then explore a behaviour they can choose.

Choose one prompt that fits the moment:

  • “Where do you think that expectation is coming from?”
  • “What would giving this a useful effort look like, even if the result is uncertain?”
  • “What is one action you want to focus on next time?”

You might ask: “Is there anything I say or do that adds to that pressure?” Listen to the answer without immediately explaining your intentions.

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WHEN COMPARISON TAKES OVER

Ask“What matters most to you about your own journey?”

Why Reconnect with personal purpose and progress.

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Get curious about what comparison means to them.

Comparison may reveal something they admire, want to learn or feel worried about. Explore that meaning without comparing their worth.

Choose one prompt that fits the moment:

  • “What do you notice about them that matters to you?”
  • “Is there something you would like to learn, rather than measure yourself against?”
  • “What progress have you noticed in yourself that a result might not show?”

Avoid needing to prove that your athlete is better. Bring the conversation back to their experience, interests and next step.

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WHEN CONFIDENCE DISAPPEARS

Ask“What have you learned about yourself from the difficult moments you've already faced?”

Why Explore evidence of capability without forcing positivity.

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Leave room for uncertainty.

They do not have to feel completely confident before taking a manageable step. Explore what support, preparation or perspective would help.

Choose one prompt that fits the moment:

  • “What feels uncertain right now?”
  • “What could help you feel more prepared or supported?”
  • “What small step would you be willing to try, even with some doubt?”

You do not need to persuade them to feel positive. “I can see this feels difficult, and I’m here with you” leaves room for an honest answer.

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WHEN SPORT STOPS BEING ENJOYABLE

Ask“What would help make this feel more like your sport again?”

Why Listen for autonomy, enjoyment and what matters to them.

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Listen before looking for a solution.

Ask what has changed and what they would like more say in. Their answer may be about training, relationships, pressure, rest or something else.

Choose one prompt that fits the moment:

  • “What parts do you still look forward to, if any?”
  • “What would you like more choice or say in?”
  • “Would you like help talking to your coach about what needs to change?”

Leave room for rest or a different direction. If they describe feeling unsafe or ongoing distress, take that seriously and help them find appropriate support.

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You don't have to fix every difficult moment. Sometimes being curious, listening and reminding your athlete that they're valued beyond their results is enough.

Changefully — Developing the person behind the performance.

WHEN YOU’D LIKE TO GO A LITTLE FURTHER

Want more support?

Start with what feels useful for you and your athlete. There’s no need to do everything.

A PERSONAL CONVERSATION

Coaching with Jeff

Ask about individual mental performance coaching and whether it could suit your young athlete.

Ask about coaching ↓

FREE PRACTICAL TOOLS

The Changefully Toolkit

Explore exercises for confidence, focus, pressure and other moments in sport.

Explore the free tools ↗

WINNING HAPPY · COMING IN 2027

Performing with joy

Discover Jeff’s book, Winning Happy: 20 Principles for Performing with Joy.

Explore Winning Happy ↗

A LITTLE SUPPORT / WHEN YOU NEED IT

Wondering whether mental performance coaching could help your young athlete?

At Changefully, we work with young athletes to develop self-awareness, confidence and practical skills for navigating performance pressure.

Ask Jeff about what coaching involves, or use the existing booking page to choose a session.

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